Ink Tea Stone Leaf

I have often thought about how I would memorialize Brian Wilson, who touched my heart with his songs and taught me much of what I know about art and music, on the day he passed away. Ever since his dementia diagnosis was made public last year, I assumed this day would come sooner rather than later, but nevertheless I still wasn’t quite sure how to memorialize him. I had to think about it for a moment.

As the tributes on social media rolled in, I realized that most people were citing the same small number of songs, eternal favorites like “God Only Knows” or “Don’t Worry Baby.” Those songs are perfect, and people are right to cite them. But it would be redundant of me to tell the world how much I love “God Only Knows.” Realizing that, I knew what I ought to write.

Here are ten songs that won’t be on most of the top ten or twelve or whatever number lists you see posted in memory of one of the most remarkable composers of the 20th century. Some of them are on some of the lists, certainly, but they’re not the ones everybody already knows (or that everybody ought to already know). Perhaps they’re not as good as “God Only Knows,” but really, what is? What matters is the meaning these songs have for me, and what they could mean to you, if you listen.

1. Please Let Me Wonder

I build all my goals around you
That someday my love would surround you
You'll never know what we've been through
For so long I've thought about it
And now I just can't live without it
This beautiful image I have of you

2. Let Him Run Wild

All the dreams you shared with him
You might as well forget
I know you need a truer love
And that's what you'll get
And now that you don't need him
Well he can have his freedom

3. Busy Doin’ Nothing

I get a lot of thoughts in the morning
I write them all down
If it wasn't for that, I'd forget 'em in a while
And lately I've been thinking about a good friend
I'd like to see more of, yeah yeah yeah,
I think I'll make a call

4. Can’t Wait Too Long

Baby you know that I can't wait forever
Awoke in the night again, we were together
Windows of darkness are all I can see through
Searching the shadows, hoping to see you

5. This Whole World

You are there like everywhere
Like everyone you see
Happy, because you're living and you're free
Now here comes another day for your love

6. Cool Cool Water

From the mountains on down to the sea
Cool water keeps on cooling me
When the nights are too hot to keep cool
I keep on dreaming about a swimming pool
When I'm just too hot to move
Cool, cool water is such a groove
In a shady spot when I'm laying down
Only thing moving are the ants on the ground
When I'm thirsty and I reach for a glass
Cool water tastes like such a gas

7. ‘Til I Die

I'm a leaf on a windy day
Pretty soon I'll be blown away
How long will the wind blow?

8. Still I Dream of It

I'm convinced of it,
The hypnosis of our minds can take us far away
It's so easy now,
You see someone up there high
And heaven's here to stay

9. Melt Away

I won't let you see me suffer
No, not me
I won't let you hear me crying
No, not me
I won't let you see me sighing
Whoa, not me

10. Midnight’s Another Day

All these voices, all these memories
Make me feel like stone
All these people make me feel so alone

__________

All of these songs were written or co-written by Brian Wilson, but “This Whole World” is sung by his brother Carl Wilson, and “Cool Cool Water” is sung by Brian together with his cousin Mike Love.

__________

Some added context a week later, because I can’t stop writing context:

“Please Let Me Wonder” and “Let Him Run Wild” are songs from 1965, the year before the release of Wilson’s masterpiece, Pet Sounds. They reflect the kind of emotional sensitivity and production technique that he was building toward on that album, and growth from his earliest surf and car compositions.

“Busy Doin’ Nothing” is from 1968, and represents a period in which Wilson was deliberately retreating from the elaborate complexity of Pet Sounds and Smile, due to the feelings of rejection and failure he associated with them. It is based on a gentle bossa nova groove and reflects Wilson’s homebody lifestyle.

“Can’t Wait Too Long” is a song recorded from 1967 and 1968, later arranged into the sequence heard here. Although it slightly postdates the sessions for Smile, it is reminiscent of the overall sound of Smile, was recorded in sections meant to be rearranged later, and was similarly left unfinished.

“This Whole World” is from 1970, one of Wilson’s contributions to Sunflower, an album that saw the other members of the Beach Boys begin to take a more active role in songwriting and production. It reflects a kind of utopian optimism that contrasts with “‘Til I Die,” a 1971 song which reaches into the depths of Wilson’s depression, using all of his skill at arranging vocal harmony to express his feelings of cosmic insignificance.

“Cool Cool Water” is also from Sunflower, but it was derived from an unfinished song recorded during the Smile sessions. Many of the songs contributed by Wilson during the late 60s and 70s were outtakes and modified forms of songs from Smile, due to his reduced songwriting output.

“Still I Dream of It” is from 1977, recorded for the (so far) unreleased album Adult/Child. Wilson once again had nearly complete creative control, and used it to express deeply personal and often strange feelings, but his voice had been damaged by heavy drug use, and the album was ultimately rejected by the Beach Boys for being un-commercial.

“Melt Away” is from Wilson’s 1988 solo album Brian Wilson, an album made while Wilson was under the abusive control of the psychologist Eugene Landy, who was barred from contacting him in 1991. This version of the song is from 1995’s I Just Wasn’t Made for These Times, the soundtrack of a documentary by Don Was that features re-recordings of many songs by Wilson and the Beach Boys.

“Midnight’s Another Day” is from 2008, following the completion of Wilson’s 2004 version of Smile. It is one of the most affecting and brilliant productions of his entire solo career.